Whenever you're in school, at work, or partying on your local bars, there's always a time that there's this one girl that you pay attention to. In layman's term, it's called CRUSH.
More often than not, a lot of you people are shy to draw near to that person because you're afraid of being rejected. Yup! It's true. That's probably the most common problems any men would encounter.
But in most cases, if there is someone that you like and you're not ready to tell her about it YET, within the boundaries that your capability allows you to, then you can be friends with her, right now at least.
Okay, what do you think is the most proper way to approach the girl that you really really like?
These are the steps that could help you with your problems.
Disclaimer: These are just my thoughts and opinions, and some stuffs that I've read from the internet so if you don't concur, I don't care.
1. Be confident but not arrogantOne of the most important tips that you need to keep in mind. Just be yourself. Don't pretend to be somebody else. The way you walk, talk, and the way you present yourself to her. Don't overdo things and you need to overcome your shyness. Always remember that nervousness is something that should be kept at bay. Otherwise, you can just forget about winning her over.
2. Maintain correct body languageWomen from this generation are really observant nowadays. They can easily figure out a person just by observing your body language. For instance, playing with one of your earlobes, sweating, drying up of the mouth, etc. Another thing, though, don't you ever get your cellphone and pretend that you got a text message or you're texting someone. That's very inappropriate. That simply gives an indication that you are nervous. Always maintain a positive body language when you're talking to her, you know, back straight and shoulders square, don't shrug! Avoid excessive hand movements and of course...wait for it...stop looking at your stupid watch or cellphone time and time again.
3. Maintain eye contactLook at her straight in the eye, but not in a horrible or freaky way. It was said that one of the main reasons why girls rejected guys is because they couldn't maintain a proper eye contact. When you're looking at her square in the eye, especially when you talk to her, can be a sign of self-assurance. On the other hand, when you avoid a person's gaze, that can be a sign of weakness and girls don't like that, especially when you are talking to her. But if you do this the right way, she will be impressed by you.
4. Start a great conversation After you've successfully overcame steps 1 through 3, you need to start a great conversation. So what do you think is the best topic to begin with? It's really up to you. You need to get more information about her so you can open up a lot of things that you can talk about and vice versa. (You should open up too). Remember, don't argue with her.
Listen to what the girl has to say. Use her answer to your initial comment to lead into other comments or questions. Show an interest in her answers and talk more about her perspective in the ongoing conversation. If it seems to be going well, say something like "Oh, by the way my name is...JV." At this point, if she is enjoying talking to you she will answer with her own.
When you're in the middle of the conversation and both of you are having fun, don't you ever use a pick up line! Never! Come on, it's day one. Don't be a jerk. That's older than old school. Never walk up and say something corny such as, "You must be tired because you have been running through my head all day." WTF! Girls usually hate that, except for the fact that John Lloyd said it. Anyway, my point here is that you shouldn't make her feel that you sounded desperate and appeared too interested in her. Don't break the ice with some stupid punch lines. You can always tell some jokes or funny stories but not like that one.
5. Don't listen to what other people sayWhether it's from your friends, enemies, colleagues, or whatnot, don't listen to every negative words they say. If they tease you, make fun of you about the feelings you have for her, then be it. They're not the one you want, right? Just do what you have to do until you succeed with your mission.
6. Be friendlyKeep this in mind. Don't. Rush. Things. Start your relationship in a friendly manner. Talk and act naturally to her. Don't you ever get to the point where she thinks you're getting a little way too far. She will be uncomfortable when this happens and UFC (unproportional friendship and companionship) will arise.
7. Get her numberDecide at some point. If things are going well, then ask for her number. This is a make or break situation and a lot of guys are scared to do this step. Honestly, it's quite difficult but like I said, if things are going well, why not ask for her number. You can at least tell her that you've enjoyed talking with her and ask if you can give her a call. (Or you can give her a text message, add her on Facebook, or chat with her on Skype)
After you finally got her number, call or text her within the day. Do you think it'll sound too desperate? I don't think so. The rules on this have changed over the years. Before, you have to wait 2-3 days before calling a woman after she gave you her number. Not any more. These days, women are going to think you've moved on and so will they. I think you should call her right within the day after getting her number. After all, by giving you her number, she has shown that she is obviously interested. So call her and let her know you're interested too before it's too late.
8. Look good and be yourselfYour personality and your looks go a long way in helping you win over a girl. Ruggedly dressed men, weird hairdo, and full-on beard have never been the one to win a woman's heart. Well, some women likes that. (unless she's weird and likes cavemen). Dress smartly, maintain basic hygiene, and look good. Just always remember to be yourself while approaching her. Pretenses can be a big turn-off for many women, so don’t take any chances.
Overall, it's all about believing in yourself. I think that's the most important thing. Every men have their own skills when it comes to women. They just never know when or how they're going to use it. If you think you have it, use it wisely. Don't be a douchebag.
Always remember that
"Optimism is the foundation of courage."
I hope this shit finds you well.
